02/04/2025
day two of a weight loss journey. i'm hoping to get to 40kg by the end of the month, so that's slightly over 10kg i have left to lose.
today was weird. i woke up early so that i had time to do everything i needed to down the street. my library card expired, so i had to get the librarian to re-open my account, and i still had to get all my meds from the chemist. i've started taking iron and vitamin d supplements again. it was a lot. my bag rustled on the walk home. hopefully i shouldn't have to leave the house for the next week or so, though.
i've also started fixing the garden again. just keeping it neat. i've started to pick up household chores again in general, but the garden is feral. so we'll see how i do with that.
04/04/2025
accidentally slept in today. i fucking hate myself.
15/04/2025
i've been doing really, really not well lately. i've been having the most trouble talking to people, as in, i open my inbox or my texts or whatever and it triggers a mild anxiety attack. at least i think it's mild, because i do get lightheaded and my extremities tingle but that's sort of it?
i kind of wanna share this site with a close friend of mine, because i'm so proud of the progress i've made in CSS, but i also very much don't want them to have this realtime stream of consciousness, since they'd worry. i'd worry too, if this site was the only context i had for this brain, but the thing is that i'm really trying. even when i brag about restricting here, i'm also consciously trying to stay balanced and feed myself like a human.
i am writing this journal entry while i'm supposed to be reading support material for work, though.